A long, long time ago I
cant quite remember
.In the year 1998 BC (Before Common Riding). There was a man who lived in a shoe called
Barry Shaun Ian Gary Craig Colin Michael Martin Jamie
He came from a proud
equestrian family. However, due to a
rare tropical disease (thought to be caught at the Dook Stane) he was no longer
able to mount his steed.
He was shunned by has family
and was shipped off to Samy Ling.
During his time in solitary
confinement, whilst smoking his peace pipe, an image appeared before him in the
He set to work to create his
vision. 32 Ύ days later his mission was
complete. He stood back and admired
His big, bright red shiny chopper.
For all of you who thought
that the Scottish inventor
Kirkpatrick MacMillan invented the bike this is just a myth.
This was his opportunity to
be reunited with his family.
He mounted his big, bright
red shiny chopper and pedal power prevailed.
As he fled for freedom all
that he left behind was dust and orange flapping robes.
However, his freedom was
nearly short lived - as Big George Lockerberry nearly cleaned him up on the
first corner on his wood wagon. He got a
wobble on and his fillip filop flipped off.
He travelled for 42 ½ days
and 42 ½ nights he had the village in his sights.
He sped by the White Gate,
only pulling in once to let Pelosis by grabbing a 50p Tub on the way.
He stopped at the monument
to snog the sacred sod.
With a salute to Dick and
his dog he headed home.
His family welcomed him with
open arms. They praised his wonderful
This was the beginning of
our New Ancient Tradition.
The Fraser family have been
strong supporters of our Common Riding ever since.
Even today his Great, Great,
Great, Great, Great, Great, Great, Great, Grand-daughter twice removed
from the shoe
Gilly Fraser the World Famous News Correspondent says
YOU DO HAVE THE BEST COMMON RIDING OF THE LOT
A Big CCR thankyou to Tub Turnbull (circa 1999) and Tubess Cuthbert I (circa 2001) for this new, yet, Bunkumos Ceremony for 2007.